What these two movies share: Images of the beautiful English countryside, farms, farm animals, rain, two people who don't communicate well and don't know how to deal with their emotions in a healthy way. They are two very different movies though. Dark River being a sad drama and Wild Mountain Thyme a funny romance.
Dark River, 2018 ***
A sad story about a woman who returns to her family farm after running away from the man then the memories of her father‘s abuse. She struggles with her brother for control of the farm, but no one wins. Starring Ruth Wilson who I recognize from so many things, especially Luther and Jayne Eyre, and Mark Stanley from many things, too, especially Game of Thrones and Sanditon, and only in flashback scenes as the abusive father, is Sean Bean, also of Game of Thrones fame. Trigger warnings: Sexual abuse and sheep shearing, which can be scary to some. Don't judge. I watched this on Amazon Prime.
Wild Mountain Thyme (2020) **** kept popping up in different algorithms and lists because I clearly love romance movies and British shows. Yes, I do know this movie is set in Ireland. So there. I finally watched it and was so anxious with the characters acting out in such a lovely way the stereotypical act of hiding emotions of human connection while overly expressing emotions that cause or maintain rifts that is soooo associated with British (and Irish) people. But this was as much heartwarming as it was heart-wrenching. I can watch Emily Blunt and Jamie Dornan over and over in this movie. Surprisingly, Christopher Walken and John Hamm show up as an excellent and entertaining supporting cast.
Reviewer Christie Lemire sums this movie up well:
"A slight from childhood, which we see in an early flashback, and the rights to a small piece of land connecting their families’ properties serve as insurmountable obstacles to the fact that they’re clearly meant for one another. Besides knowing everything about each other, sharing decades of history and enjoying a lively chemistry, they’re the only single, gorgeous people of their age around. And so we must wait 102 minutes for them to acknowledge they’ve secretly been in love with each other all this time."
Trigger warnings: Christopher Walken being himself while pretending to have an Irish accent.
I tried to have a Happy New Year movie marathon, but I gave up, after these three movies let me down... all in a row.
Happy New Years (2014)
This was a Bollywood comedy-action-dance-competition flick. Yeah, I said it. What I find astounding about the random Bollywood movies I decide to watch, is that they all seem to star the same few guys: Shah Rukh Khan (✔ He’s in this movie, too), Sonu Sood (✔ He’s in this movie, too), Amitabh Bachchan (✘ He’s not in this movie). There’s an excessively produced mud fight scene that is only there as a venue to show the audience that Shah Rukh Khan, 49 at the time this movie was made (lies!), has a ripped body and is a total badass. There’s another action scene to convince you Sonu Sood is also a badass. Most Bollywood isn’t my thing. I’ve seen some epics that I thought were great. They were depicting tales from India’s history, mythology and folklore. When I venture into the comedy genre, I find that the humor and cheese just doesn’t please my palette.
Production Co: Red Chilies Entertainment
How’d you watch it: Netflix
New Year New You (2018) This one is about a bunch of friends getting together for NYE that is supposed to be a thriller/horror, but it takes too long to tell the story. They’re trying to use Jordan Peele styling, but unfortunately, they got it wrong. Every second of the movie can’t be creepy or suspenseful, or you’ll never be surprised. I gave it a long painful 40-minute try, but I always tell others to just stop an uncomfortably bad movie, so I took my own advice.
Production Co: Blumhouse Television
How’d you watch it: Hulu
New Year, New Us (2021) An urban fiction movie – but a bad one. A woman wants to have a baby with her reluctant husband, so she tried to engage in a lot of sex until he gets tired of it. Then, at work, he gets a sexy, flirty intern. I stopped it there, before it became any more like a cheesy porn flick.
As much as I get fed up with brooding male law enforcement/detective characters, I end up getting hooked on their shows. The latest of which, is The Sinner, regularly on USA Network, but I’ve watched seasons 1-3 on Netflix. Season 1 was fantastic. It opens with a woman, Cora, played by Jessica Biel, with her family in a crowded summer beach scene, when she experiences a mental break, then attacks and kills a man, seemingly unprovoked. The lead investigator is Ambrose, played by Bill Pullman. The rest of the season tells a twisted tale that explores what lead Cora to the point of violent attack. The value of a woman and the definition of womanhood is a looming theme throughout.
I like to think of good storytelling as onion peeling. Have you ever cut into an onion and found that other baby onions were inside that one? That’s what The Sinner is like. Each episode peels back the onion, but then you find a whole other story that needs to be peeled…. And there are multiples of those. At a certain point, season 1 started to go down a True Detective vector, but then it totally distinguished itself. The casting and acting are statue-winning caliber. Biel, Pullman and the actor who plays her husband, Christopher Abbot, are phenomenal. In season 2, Ambrose assists a friend’s daughter, who is a budding local police department detective, with the investigation of a child who murdered the two people who kidnapped him from the cult-commune where he lived with his mother. That was a hard sentence to write! See all the potential baby onions? Motherhood and what constitutes nurturing a child seems to be the overall theme in this season. One baby onion is Ambrose’s personal story: Can’t have a brooding detective without a troubled past or current life. Ambrose’s personal stories, in my opinion, parallel the stories of who he is investigating. In season 1, he has a S&M relationship with a prostitute and at the same time, his relationship with his wife is crumbling as she becomes fed up with his increasing emotional distance. In season 2, the majority of the investigation takes place in the town where he grew up and experienced a traumatic early life and the death of his mother.
Christmas, Again (2014) *** I was certain before I hit play that I had watched this movie sometime in the past couple of years, but it isn't on any of my past holiday movie lists. A sad and lonely Christmas tree salesman is back another year at the same NYC tree lot, but this time with some emotional pain in tow. What I really like about this movie is how it presented the story arc of his heartbreak, the use of silence, expressions, and gestures to get emotion across. That's the result of good a acting-directing combo. By the way, this film is a rare positive result of the same writer and director. I have to also give props for the good use of Arabian Dance from The Nutcracker.It sets the perfect tone for this story.
Production: It was a low-budget indie as opposed to a low-budget cheesy movie.
Suspension of belief: Low
Tropes/sub-genres: Character living through sadness from a pre-movie incident
A Christmas To Remember (2015) * “Featuring” Robin Givens who makes a short appearance towards the end of the movie, A Christmas To Remember was only worth watching because it is so-bad-it's-funny-to-watch-with-a-friend as I did with my best friend. Actually, I think we may have fast forwarded through this one. It was difficult to watch even while laughing. My main complaint was that the technical skills to make a film were lacking by these filmmakers. None of the characters were mic'd nor did there seem to be any reliable audio capture equipment around because the sound was terrible. The camera was shaky and the lighting and filtering changed with almost every single cut. I know a trained camera operator was no where nearby, because composing and framing a shot was not on anyone's mind. Creatively, the story was all over the place. It looked like it was going to be a Hatfields vs McCoys situation with two rival families that would be brought together by the love of the family heads, but then all of the stories of each of the children were brought to light. And each family had at least five members. There was no way to successfully hash out and resolve at least 10 different stories. Bad production, incomplete stories, terrible personal styling. For a good laugh, read my best friend's review here: Dante Rants
Production: Limbo contest winners low
Suspension of belief: Mountain high
Tropes: Rival families... anything else is unclear
Diversity: Reverse! This was a Black cast with one white supporting character
Paranormal: No, but it would have helped the plot
Clownish character: I plead the 5th
Production Co: Atlanta Dream Team Productions
How'd you watch it: Amazon
London Mitchell's Christmas (2019) * This most certainly was not a holiday romance movie, but it was so bad I kept watching anyway. Everything in this movie was too long. It needed a serious editor, because this easily could have been cut from 1:40 to 30 minutes. I watched this movie twice: Once by myself, fast forwarding through each excessive conversation. Then another time with my bestie over the phone, as we synced scenes and I guided him through the highlights. Considering the plot, it's hard to believe that such a self-absorbed and despicable person could get everyone he treated so poorly to forgive, forget and love him just because he has cancer. Read my bestie's review here: Dante Rants
Production value: Mid-low. They skimped on writing and editing
Suspension of belief: High!
Tropes: A very modified Scrooge trope
Diversity: This film has an all-black cast
Paranormal: None
Clownish character: London Mitchell was a joke, but I don't think you could really call him a clown.
I definitely watched holiday movies with a different mindset during this past holiday season. It was 2020. No explanation needed. So, let's jump right in.
Patterns I noticed this year
I ended up watching a lot of the same tropes: Ambitious career persons, return to home town and lovable father figure characters. Multiples times these tropes crossed paths in the same movie. Also, I'm going to try and fit everything into three posts:
The Good and the Okay
The Bad and the Unfinished
The Not-Romantic
The Good and the Okay
Feast of the Seven Fishes (2019) **** Feast of Seven Fishes is a holiday comedy with feel-good moments along the same lines of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation and The Family Stone. The basic plot follows a few days in the life of a young man, Tony, and a young woman, Beth, who stumble upon a little romance and spend a couple of life-changing days together. I fell in love, just like Beth does, with the very hilarious, loving, and Italian Olviera family. The casting was perfect and featured some Sopranos alum, which gave the family scenes an authentic, rather than stereotypical feel. I am smitten with Skyler Gisondo who I saw previously in Booksmart!
Production Co: Allegheny Image Factory, Witty Michaels Entertainment
How'd you watch it: Hoopla
Holiday Heist (2019) **** A family-owned jewelry store is being cased by a guy who needs to make some quick money to pay back the local crime boss. He gets hired on by the patriarch and ends up genuinely caring for the family and falling for one of its members. Cute colorful Christmas romance with just the right amount of cheese, just right production, even the music was enjoyable. If this movie was given a bigger marketing budget and maybe featured one big name actor, this might have been successful in theaters.
Tropes/sub-genres: Enemies to lovers; You're boyfriend ain't right for you
Diversity: Pretty much everyone was a person of color.
Production Co: Mar Vista
How'd you watch it: Hoopla
Christmas a la Mode (2019) **** This was a nice refreshing story about a dairy farm/creamery on the verge of going under until the two sisters/owners have a fire lit under them with the threat (or hope) of a sale. An agent representing a dairy conglomerate that is putting an offer on the farm turns out to be handsome, charming and rooting for the farmer sister to succeed in keeping the farm. The lead actor’s American accent started to fail and I’m proud to say I guessed he was Australian.
Production: There were definitely on location at a working farm. I'm sad to say there was no smell-o-vision during the creamery scenes, dammit.
Tropes/sub-genres: Family rivalry; Enemies to lovers; Save the business
Diversity: Nope.
Production Co: H9 Films, Moody Independent
How'd you watch it: Hoopla
Last Christmas (2019) *** Last Christmas Stars Emilia Clarke (Game of Thrones) as a flawed and wreckless young woman named Kate who keeps on messing up and messing with the lives of her close friends and family. She bumps into odd, but nice guy, Tom, played by Henry Golding (Crazy Rich Asians) and keeps on bumping into him, until it becomes a thing. There's romance, a little speculative fiction, sage advice, self-discovery and a Christmas paegent rounding out this holiday movie. Yes! Wham!'s song, Last Christmas, is featured throughout the movie, and the whole soundtrack was chock-full of George Michael inspiration. Last Christmas was entertaining.
Production: This came out of a major studio, and you can tell no expense was spared although the home scenes looked comfy and authentic.
Suspension of belief: Medium – unlikely premise
Tropes/Sub-Genres: Odd Couple; Supernatural Romantic Comedy; Flawed character reaches rock bottom; Self-actualization/realization
Diversity: Yes!
Production Co: Universal Pictures
How'd you watch it: Checked out the DVD from the library
Picture a Perfect Christmas (2019) *** Stars Hallmark regular, Merritt Patterson (Christmas at the Palace, A Royal Winter), as an ambitious photographer who returns to her home town for some needed time with her grandmother. She meets nana's neighbor, played by Jon Cor, and his nephew and you guessed it... sparks start to fly. Will the photographer be able to have a career and insta-family in the end? I was able to finish this pleasant film, but it didn't stand out in any way.
Production: It was Hallmark production that didn't require lavish sets or costumes, so it looked good.
Suspension of belief: Low, probably because it was so predictable
Tropes/Sub-Genres: Ambitious career person vs love; Return to home town; Father figure character standing in for a kid's real parent(s); Woman falls for loving father figure and child aka insta-family
Diversity: One supporting character of color
Production Co: Front Street Pictures, Hallmark Channel
How'd you watch it: Checked out the DVD from the library
Rent an Elf (2018) *** A Christmas-loving entrepreneur who runs a holiday event planning business is hired by a single dad to help create a special Christmas for his son who is going through a post-divorce rough patch. Want to see the whole movie? Watch the one minute and 48 seconds trailer: Same as a couple of the other three star *** films on this list, there was really nothing that hooked my heartstrings in this movie, but it wasn't bad. The cast did feature Sean Patrick Thomas from Save the Last Dance. Playing his mother was Debbi Morgan, a major soap star who is also well-known for Eve's Bayou.
Production: Visually this movie looked like a well-budgeted-basic Hallmark or Mar Vista, so it looked good.
Suspension of belief: Low, probably because it was so predictable
Tropes/Sub-Genres: Woman falls for loving father figure and child aka insta-family; Wreckless ex schemes to get ex back
Diversity: About half of the main characters are of color
Production Co: The Asylum
How'd you watch it: Amazon, but it was also on Ion Channel's Sunday marathons.
The Rooftop Christmas Tree (2016) *** Michelle Morgan (Heartland) plays a lawyer who returns to her hometown in hopes of scaling back her life from the big city, but instead, the first case she takes on is her neighbor vs the town. Tim Reid (WKRP In Cincinnati), the lawyer's hermit neighbor, is being cited for his mysterious practice of putting a Christmas tree on his roof. Will the lawyer be able to win her neighbor's case? Will the mystery of the rooftop tree be solved? For some reason, Michelle Morgan does a lot of over the shoulder talking (You know when you start talking about someone with your back to the door, then that person walks in and hears you talking about them?) as Lou on Heartland and surprisingly also in this movie, too. The biggest issue I had withThe Rooftop Christmas Tree is how quickly everything happened. I don't think this movie depicted a full week of life in this town, but the romantic leads were about ready to move in and get a Christmas tree together by the end. The story had surprising and heartfelt subplots and that was pleasing.
Production: It had an authentic small town feel to it.
Suspension of belief: High. Everything happened way too fast. Even the court and legal procedures went into warp speed. And, the main character's parents looked to be about her same age.
Tropes/sub-genres: Return to hometown; Enemies to lovers; Mysterious neighbor aka Boo Radley
Diversity: A bit. One central character and one subsequent character.
Production Co: Johnson Production Group
How'd you watch it: Amazon
A Majestic Christmas (2018) *** Another ambitious woman, an architect, is assigned a project to revamp her hometown's nostalgia-filled theater. The theater's new owner and her new client, comes off like your average gentrifying developer, but it turns out he has a heart. Sparks are flying! A Majestic Christmas features a colorful cast with interesting characters. Even with all those positives, the sparks didn't fly for me. There was something missing that I can't put my finger on. Maybe I'll like it better next year. Starring Jerrika Hinton (Grey's Anatomy, A Christmas Kiss). Christian Vincent, the actor who plays the developer, plays it really cheesy.
Production: Hallmark makes it rain on a set.
Suspension of belief: Medium
Tropes/sub-genres: Return to home town; Ambitious character struggling with career or following their heart; Gentrification
Tropes/sub-genres: Ambitious career person vs love; Investigator falls for subject of investigation
Diversity: The main characters are people of color and there are colorful people generously sprinkled throughout.
Production Co: Lifetime, Neshama Entertainment
How'd you watch it: Hoopla
Sweet Mountain Christmas (2019) *** A country-music star who has lost her way finds herself snowed in by a freak storm which stretches out for days what was meant to be a quick trip to visit her family. During her stay, she revisits the past, finds inspiration in her hometown, and maybe even love.
Production: Lifetime funds good productions, so overall it looked good, but I thought the sets and locations were a little too nice for a small one-road-in-and-out town.
Tropes/sub-genres: Return to hometown; Self-actualization/realization; Ambitious character struggling with career or following their heart; Gentrification;High school sweethearts/old flames reunite
Diversity: A drop or two.
Production Co: Lifetime, Lighthouse Pictures, Brightlight Pictures
How'd you watch it: Hoopla
Christmas In Mississippi (2017) *** An ambitious photographer (Another one?) returns to her hometown for the holidays in good ol' Mississippi. She ends up reluctantly rekindling the cut-too-soon relationship with her high school sweetheart, who is the project manager for the town's holiday light show and the caregiver of his nephew. Everything ties up neatly in the end, which I have criticized in some movies, but in Christmas in Mississippi it works because the love story starts long before the movie starts, which makes the expedited falling in love make sense. Also the plotline doesn't stray too far from the core story and they both share the same passions: Love of their home town and respective familes. Added bonus is that holiday romances don't often get a chance to feature a real place and tackle real issues, such as the Gulfport's post-Katrina recovery.
Production: Sets and styling were Gulfport authentic
Suspension of belief: Medium
Tropes/sub-genres: Father figure character standing in for a kid's real parent(s); Return to home town; Ambitious career person vs love; High school sweethearts reunite
Diversity: Color in the supporting cast
Paranormal: Is that Kris Kringle?
Clownish character: No
Production Co: Lifetime; Active Entertainment
How'd you watch it: Amazon
Christmas at the Plaza (2019) *** Christmas at the Plaza started off pretty exciting for me: A historian is hired to curate a historical installation about Christmas throughout the years at The Plaza Hotel. She is is teamed up with the very cute and personable professional Christmas decorator. Unfortunately, the writing forewent usage of any interesting plots/subplots. They missed the most the obvious, which was to have the historian show why studying history is important since one of her issues was that her profession is so under appreciated. Instead, they took the easy trope-route to the end.
Production: Location was set at The Plaza, so beautifully authentic.
Suspension of belief: Medium
Tropes/sub-genres: Modified enemies-to-lovers; You're boyfriend ain't right for you
Diversity: Just a sprinkling in the supporting cast
Production Co: Hallmark
How'd you watch it: DVD checked out from the library
A Christmas In Royal Fashion (2018) *** Rewatching this I noticed something: the audience is supposed to hate the evil boss, but if one of your employees impersonates you, wears your clothes and risks an important account, you’d fire them too.
Christmas Sitters (2020) *** An ambitious career woman (Ha!) is asked to babysit her old friends's kids while she is stuck in Europe. The career woman is doing an awkward job until the friend's brother-in-law makes a surprise appearance. He is the fun to her serious, but they both prove that they are skilled and flawed in their babysitting tasks.
Tropes/sub-genres: Opposites attract; Ambitious career woman; Rolling stone man; Family stuck somewhere due to unforeseen circumstances (Home-Alone-alike)
Diversity: Main characters are colorful
How'd you watch it: Ion Channel's holiday movie marathon
Christmas Together (2020) *** To get away and to figure out her life, an artist take a trip to a town called Tinsel, where she rents a house from a widowed father and his daughter. Vivica Fox shows up as the Christmasy-Cupid of a neighbor. Simple, but cute.
Tropes/sub-genres: You're boyfriend ain't right for you; Woman falls for loving father (figure) and child aka insta-family
Diversity: Main characters are colorful
How'd you watch it: Ion Channel's holiday movie marathon
Beaus of Holly (2020) *** I was expecting something different here, but I guess two men interested in one woman is enough for a 90-minute film. A control-freak plans the perfect romantic holiday getaway for her and her boyfriend, including a proposal. Instead of saying “yes,”he breaks up with her and leaves. She decides to stay and try to enjoy her plans, which didn't include falling for the concierge or having to figure out what she wants when the ex shows back up.
Tropes/sub-genres: You're boyfriend ain't right for you; Love triangle; Opposites attract; Control freak learns to relax
Diversity: Some of the main characters and supporting characters are colorful
How'd you watch it: Ion Channel's holiday movie marathon
Operation Christmas Drop (2020) *** A senator's aide is sent to a military base in the South Pacific to assess it for possible closure. Her escort turns out to be a philanthropic officer who cares about the indigenous people and his fellow soldiers. Cute story that exhibits the Christmas spirit on a tropical island, but no real chemistry builds between the main characters.
In the Aisles is a German film I watched with English subtitles. A young man, Christian, who has a rough past gets a job at a warehouse store. He forms relationships with his shift mates, especially his supervisor in Beverages, Bruno. And he falls in love with Marion who works in Sweet Goods, who is unhappily married. This arthouse film was a respite from the very saccarine-Hallmark-type and studio-typical stories I've been watching lately. This story is refreshingly different, It takes some dark turns, but isn't a sad story, it isn't a love story, and it isn't a story of redemption. It's just an artsy snapshot of Christian's life and the two new people who come into it through his work. The production is authentic. The music supervisor had a good ol' time: She soundtracks the beginning of the worker's shifts with the waltz, The Blue Danube. There's a random rap instrumental inserted in a longer forklift driving scene that was fun. And I don't know how a Son House song got inserted into this film, but there it was and it somehow fit. The idea of the ocean and beach was a running theme throughout the story that was unobtrusively woven through so that you had to try to notice. I enjoyed this film, I could very easily watch this again, and although I find subtitles hard to recommend to other people, I would recommend this to a few adventurous movie watchers. It was on the fun side of the Nitpix scale and I give it three stars***. I'm glad I took a chance on this DVD I checked out from the library.
Spoilers follow, but you might as well read this because if you watched the trailer then you know what happens in the movie, anyway.
I watched Greta before the COVID-19 shutdown and at the time, I thought this movie required a lot of suspension of believe to watch. Why in the world is the young woman in this movie so trusting and naïve? How did she end up the prey of this unimaginative stalker woman with a fabulous bohemian gem of an apartment in New York City?
I am in this mid-COVID-19 world now, skimming through Greta so I can write this review and I can now clearly see that there are people who think differently than I do. I was just having a conversation with my best friend about how people think: Some people only think out a few steps past their action, some people think out many steps past their action and some people don't consider the consequences of their actions at all. All those people who went to the Trump rally in Tulsa. All those young folks who partied after the summer 2020 re-opening. All those people who had COVID parties so they can get it and get it over with. They would all, after some chain of events, find themselves locked in the room behind Greta’s piano if they were the protagonist in this movie.
Back to the movie: At nearly 20 minutes into the movie Frances, the protagonist, discovers that Greta does this regularly: Sets it up so that nice, honest and usually vulnerable people find her purse on the subway and then try to return it, possibly getting caught in Greta’s trap. After discovering this fact, Frances does the smart thing and tries to get away from Greta. But then, for some stupid, bad-writing, terrible logic reason, Frances decides to dig into Greta’s life. It's like she can’t even let go. To add to the funky odd story, Greta doesn’t even bother to hide. It's like the opposite of other obsession movies, this obsessor isn’t even trying to hide her crazy behavior.
This movie was a bad. It needed more better writing and filmmaking techniques to pull off a dark obsession story. There are too many good obsession movies that put this to shame. Greta gets two stars** because I watched it, but I would never recommend it, I don’t want to watch it again and I would delete the catalog record from the library if I had control over such things.
Greta brought to mind an old movie about obsession that I’d like to revisit. Have you ever seen Mark Wahlberg’s 1996 obsessive bad-boy in Fear? I used to love that movie.
I checked the Greta DVD out from the library. Burn it.
I thought Not Cinderella's Type was
going to be a gentle romantic cheesy movie, but it turned out be an
after-school-special-like-film about emotional abuse with a storyline
that went all over the place. Let me tell you how it went:
Girl's mom dies when she is little and
her uncle and aunt, who already have two daughters, take her in.
Flash forward to 16: A boy runs over
the cat her deceased mother gave her (That's the only thing left of
her mother).
Boy tries to apologize, but she refused
to hear him, so he kind of stalks her at school and beyond.
Boy asks her out, she considers.
When talking about boy to her bestie,
she discovers that her male best friend thought they were
boyfriend-girlfriend.
Seeing both boys at the same time.
Weird neighbor who never says anything
all of a sudden calls her aunt to tattle that the girl is making out
with male best friend on the soccer field.
She finally gets fed up with the mean
uncle and aunt who treat her like a maid and she speeches at them
about how mean they are to her.
Boy comes over and picks her up and
takes her back to his house because his dad is certified to host
foster kids.
After her uncle and aunt are
investigated, she ends up living with boy and his family.
Male best friend failed to be there
when she needed him, now he's in the friend zone.
Boy and her go to prom and start
dating. Yes, she still lives in his house, but moved out to the pool
house.
The end.
Cheesy or sentimental: The production was cheap, but not
cheesy. Its like they used the producer's house and maybe the
director's parents' house for locations.
Production value: Low
Suspension of belief: High
Trope: Cinderella-like story
Diversity: Nope. Nada.
Paranormal: None.
Clownish character: None.
Rating: Not Fun; Two stars because I made it to the end **
Wild Rose is a film about a woman, who
just released from prison returns to her wild ways, including her
reckless pursuit to be a country singer in Nashville, until she finds
herself at the mental crossroads of being a good parent and pursuing
her dreams.
This movie is a woman finding herself
story. One of the things that makes this story different is that it
is set in Glasgow, when most woman finding herself stories are about
Americans. Of course, I do watch mostly American movies. Another
thing that sets this one apart, is that Rose makes a ton of mistakes,
which is kind of annoying, but the story is written so well, that she
gets out of those situations or they resolve in logical ways so I
can't get mad about it. What makes Wild Rose like other typical
woman-finding-herself stories is that it all works out in the end.
She really was a hot mess who saw no fault in her own and didn't
apologize for much throughout most of the movie, but she somehow
found herself surrounded by good, supportive people. Lucky Rose.
I really enjoy how this movie was
styled. The camera captured rich coloring and high contrasts in most
of the scenes, which gives the film a sense of depth. Personal
styling looked authentic. Even Rose in her white cowboy boots, which
must have been comfortable because she was always running. There is
one really beautiful and simply styled scene when she comes back from
London and is standing in the kitchen with her daughter. Lovely.
I thought, but didn't realize until I
read about the movie later that Jessie Buckley, the actress who plays
Rose, is fully and totally singing the songs. She manages to be an
amazing singer and an impressive actress. Julie Walters plays her
mother and you have seen her a hundred times in a hundred other
films. She was perfect in this one. I will probably download this
soundtrack as soon as I'm done posting this.
This was a good movie. I will watch it
again, and would recommend it as a double feature with Gloria or
Brittney Runs a Marathon. Three Stars***
I watched this movie on a DVD I checked out from the library.
Cheesy movies have a low production value, usually subpar acting and the storylines have a ton of holes and therefore require viewers to suspend some of their realistic expectations. I like cheesy, b-level romance and this is my 2nd cheesy holiday romance movie marathon. The bar is set low, but the cheese level is high. On my scale, Good Cheese falls onto the So Good It’s Bad side of the scale and is obviously fun for me. Bad Cheese is not fun. Click here to read about 2018 Good Cheese.
Didn’t Finish
Homeless For the Holidays-This was a c-level production, crappy writing, terrible acting (Amazon)
A Christmas in New York- Stopped it 29 minutes in because it still felt they were setting up the stories of six couples in a NYC hotel. Good luck! (Amazon)
Home for Christmas- Stopped it 22 minutes in. Felt like they were trying too hard to be Girls-Judd-Appatow-like. And then there were very annoying close-up dialogue scenes. I don’t think this was intending to be cheesy. (Amazon)
Christmas Next Door- I gave this about 20 mins, but it just didn’t hook me. Granted, I watched this after Christmas, and by then I had had my fill of holiday romance. Even so, this just sucked.
Christmas with a View- Vivica Fox, Patrick Duffy, and Kaitlyn Leeb, who plays Cassandra on my favorite Canadian TV show, Heartland, star in this movie about a failed-restaurant-owner-turned- restaurant-manager who falls in love with a visiting celebrity chef looking to settle down. The potential for a successful b-holiday romance movie was there: good cast, good locations, good styling and costuming, but the writing was awful. So many incomplete scenes and conversations that went... Click here for a trailer. (Netflix)
Shadow Island Mysteries: The Last Christmas- I was a little perturbed that I actually finished this because I fell asleep the first time so I finished it a second night. So much time wasted. The fist thing that bugged me was that they used horror or edge-of-your-seat thriller music that was completely inappropriate. There was some bad editing. And overall it was cheesy in a bad way. (Amazon)
I’ll Be Homeless for Christmas- I’m actually hoarse from laughing so hard at this movie. It was the worst movie I have ever seen. The sound and editing and everything was so exceptionally bad that at less than five minutes in, I paused the movie and called my best friend to laugh with me. We ended up watching the whole 54 minutes together. Who in the hell would plan a heist to rob a homeless shelter?! Why are all the characters and extras suffering from lack of peripheral vision. Everyone’s clothes were ill-fitting. This was a hot, but entertaining-because-it was-awful mess. (Amazon)
Christmas With a Prince- Kaitlyn Leeb stars in anther sub-par holiday romance. A pediatrician is thrown off her game when she agrees to host an injured prince in her hospital ward. So many story lines were thrown in and quickly resolved it was like a 21 episode sitcom cobbled together into a 90 minute movie. Everything was a bit off: The editing, the acting, the writing, the production and costuming. Also, it was too long. There were at least two endings and the first one would have been just fine. This is produced by the same company (Brain Power Studio) that did Christmas With a View, which was also poopy.
A Firehouse Christmas- This one wasn’t all bad, but it turned into bad comedy toward the end and now it lives in Bad Cheese land.
Cheesy movies have a low production value, usually subpar acting and the storylines have a ton of holes and therefore require viewers to suspend some of their realistic expectations. I like cheesy, b-level romance and this is my 2nd cheesy holiday romance movie marathon. The bar is set low, but the cheese level is high. On my scale, Good Cheese falls onto the So Good It’s Bad side of the scale and is obviously fun for me. Bad Cheese is not fun. To read about 2018 bad cheese, click here.
Good Cheese
Dashing Through the Snow- This Hallmark movie was about a professional crafter who misses her flight and decides to share a rental car with a handsome stranger heading in the same direction. There’s a Homeland Security twist to this story. Good production and acting, but the writing could have used some help. (DVD checked out from the library)
Desperately Seeking Santa- Starring Laura Vandervoort (Character actor and cheesy romance star) as an executive seeking to increase holiday sales at the mall she manages and earn herself a promotion. She contrives to hire a sexy Santa as a marketing campaign, but then she falls for him and finds a cause to stand up for. Good production and writing, but on-screen chemistry was at a minimal. I watched this with Amazon Prime.
A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding- This Netflix production was spared no expense. It was really well done, top of the line cheese, complete with blooper-lined credits. We return to the story of Amber and King Richard of Aldovia who are getting ready to get married. Royal protocol keeps getting in the way of wedding bliss and to boot, there’s something fishy going on with Aldovia’s economy. Can Amber and Richard make thing s right? Of course! This is s cheesy romance. A happy ending is guaranteed! (Netflix)
Holiday Calendar- This movie was holiday Afrobubblegum: A movie about people of color that is fun and made little to no mention of race or class issues. A photographer stuck in a nowhere job is inspired to go for her dreams by the return of her best friend and the gift of a magical Advent calendar. A Netflix production that was well done with a charming story that required little suspended belief. The diverse cast did a great job as well. (Netflix)
Dear Santa- This might have been the best cheesy holiday movie I’ve ever seen. A spoiled rich girl finds a dear Santa letter written by a little girl asking for love for her father. The rich girl takes it upon herself to provide. Along the way she finds herself genuinely giving of herself instead of by false pretense. It just seemed like there was relatively little need to suspend reality while watching this. As far as acting goes, everyone did a good job, even the little girl. The production was as good as a network TV movie. This might be my favorite. (Netflix)
Christmas at Holly Lodge- This was a really great holiday cheesy romance from the innovators of cheesy romance at the Hallmark Channel. And it stars Jordan Bridges, son of Beau. A winter lodge owner is in arrears when a real estate developer comes to investigate the property. He falls in love with the property and the owner she finds out his original intentions and plays silly games instead of just confronting him. a classical American romance movie. (DVD checked out from the library)
Switched for Christmas- Another Hallmark hit starring Candace Cameron-Bure as middle-aged adult twin sisters (she plays two roles... remember Full House?) who have fallen out of touch with each other, so they decide to switch lives to see how the other is living. Of course their relationship is rekindled and so is romance for the both of them. This was deliciously easy to swallow cheese! A sweet movie and with Hallmark on the production there are no complaints. (DVD checked out from the library)
Princess Switch- So much royalty! So many switch-ups! This was a cute sweet colorful-people having, prince-charming, cake baking cheesy holiday romance. A Chicago-based baker is invited to participate in the Belgravia (fictional country) baking competition. When in Belgravia, she finds that her identical doppelgänger is a duchess betrothed to the prince of Belgravia. The decide to switch lives for a couple of days of course they fall in love with the men in the switched lives. (Netflix)
A Princess for Christmas- Starring Sam Heughan from the awesome Outlander series, this movie wins the prize for cheesiest-but-goodest. An out of work antique expert and aunt to two orphans, gets the opportunity to take her niece and nephew back to their father’s home country where they are royalty. She falls in love with their uncle, the prince, melts the icy heart of their grandfather, the duke, and befriends the staff. It started and I almost gave up because of the bad cheese, but I’m glad I stuck it out because those lumps smoothed out in about 30 mins. My only complaint is that the music sounded too synthesized. (Amazon... and I paid for it! Darn you, Heughan!)
I also watched and enjoyed Southern Christmas aka Heartland Christmas and Christmas Town.
The audience gets to experience men
exploring their relationships and desires. I think all four of the starring actors
bring their a-game to their characters, and we get a sense of depth,
vulnerability and commonality. The introduction or first 15 minutes of
this film is a fast-paced and intensifying set-up, but then it slows
down to allow this man-empowerment story to unfold.
I'm going to discuss a couple of
scenes. If you are squeamish about spiders or spoilers, stop reading
here.
Discussing exploring emotions often
happens right before bed, so there are several bedroll scenes showing
Sisters brothers sleeping out in the open. In one of them a spider crawls into
poor Eli's mouth. He does not wake up. He does not pass go. He
collects a fever, swelling and eventually barfs up blood and baby
spiders. John C. Reilly brings about a sense of
brooding vulnerability as Eli Sisters, who only desires to see the
schoolteacher he left behind somewhere, go home and be treated
fairly. I'm assuming the spider was a vehicle
to establish Eli's vulnerability, but also Charlie's loyalty to him
despite their constant bickering. That's great and all, but the
spider bit was gross.
Although there was interesting
relationship development between the two pairs of men, the most
touching of scene was between Eli and Warm who, considering the
circumstances of them coming together and the brevity of their
relationship, were able to sit and have a profound and enlightening
exchange.
There was a random point where I was
jarred out of the story: All of a sudden, Joaquin Phoenix' character
is telling a story and he appears to be in a darkened room with a
natural-light spotlight. It is quite weird.
Also, production values were notably
good. The soundtrack, which I spent more time noticing the second
time I watched this movie, was dynamic and made each scene.
This movie ended in bittersweet
contentment. It was good and I'd be happy to watch this again and
again. I give it four stars**** for the great acting, the compelling
story and well done art production. It definitely falls on the
Masterpiece end of the scale.
Recipe: take the production level of a good Hallmark movie and use it to make a drama television series set on a Montana ranch. Then sprinkle in some f-bombs and sex scenes to give it a harder edge. Here you are, on a rustic pine platter: Yellowstone!
Yellowstone is about a family that has been the caretakers of a huge swath of Montana land for several generations and their patriarch who is trying his darndest to hold onto the power he has in the state so he can pass it on to his four children and possibly also his long-time ward turned right-hand man. Criminal behavior abounds as their grip on Montana starts to slip. The four children all go through their own private miseries and you end up wondering what the heck is John Dutton fighting for?
The acting in the first few episodes was pretty cheesy. Australian actor, Kelly Reilly, who played Beth, kept dropping her Montana accent and just overplayed the role. Kevin Costner was there. Wes Bentley was cheesy. Kelsey Asbille brought her top-notch game to the sets. She was outstanding in this cheesy crowd.
The writing was cheesy to basic. There were some flashback scenes to help explain Beth's erratic behavior, but they were oddly placed in the narrative. In the episode, A Monster Is Among Us, there seems to be (or at least I hope there was) some juxtaposition about blood in bathrooms. Gross. Oh yeah, Kevin Costner was there.
My mom told me about this show while we hiked amongst the redwoods. Like a storyteller, she recalled the storyline in A Monster Is Among Us because the terrain reminded her of the episode. Her version was much more colorful and interesting.
Something about TV shows and movies at this level of cheesy keeps me coming back for more. So I finished Yellowstone and I found it entertaining. I will give season 2 a go.
This show is cheesy, so I'm giving it a rating of Good Cheese.
Royal Matchmaker is a thoroughly cute Hallmark movie about a professional matchmaker who takes on a prince as her latest client. Of course, they fall in love.
Stars: Bethany Joy Lenz and Will Kemp
Obstacles: Tradition and a woman more befitting of a prince
Quality: All the levels are set at good: Plot, writing, art direction and acting.
I would definitely re-watch this and recommend to any fan of cheesy romance, so it gets a rating of Good Cheese.
Can You Every Forgive Me? is an enjoyable movie with Melissa
McCarthy playing a very believable and funny-by-happenstance woman who finds
herself forging letters by famous authors.
All the levels are set at good: Good acting, good
production, good writing, etc. Melissa McCarthy and her co-star, Richard E.
Grant were both nominated for best actress and supporting actor respectively at
the Oscars, Golden Globes and SAG Awards. After finally watching CYEFM?, I am
surprised they were nominated because there wasn’t anything great or inspiring
about this film. My suspicion is that voting committees were impressed by
McCarthy’s non-comedy performance, which was good, but not award worthy.
I would watch this again and would recommend it, but I don’t
think it offers anything spectacular to the cinematic world so I’m giving it
three stars***.
Mini rant: Vice, Green Book, I, Tonya, Get Out, Lady Bird, Birdman,
Her, American Hustle were all nominated for Golden Globe Award for Best Motion
Picture – Musical or Comedy. Can You Ever Forgive Me? gets nominated for Golden Globe Award for Best
Motion Picture – Drama. What the hell is that about?
Mary Queen of Scots tells the story of what happened to Mary after she return to Scotland to claim her throne and how her relationship with her cousin, Queen Elizabeth came to its fatal end.
I thought Saoirse Ronan and Margot Robie were excellent in their respective roles. I’m usually fascinated by the styling and productions of British period films and this was no exception. The story felt slow towards the middle, but finished with a punch. Also, it doesn’t help that I’m all agog when it comes to the Scottish accent. Thank you, Outlander, for your influence!
You really get a sense of the ridiculous crap that Mary went through, some of it based on bad decision making on her own part, but a lot of it based on men steering the queens in both camps. Mary was ripped to shreds by the men in her life, and Elizabeth managed to avoid some of the same unwanted control. There was some artistic licenses taken when creating this story of the two queens, but I found in this film that both queens dealt with their own share of sadness and helplessness in each of their predicaments.
I can’t wait to read the book this was based on Queen of Scots: The True Life of Mary Stuart by John Guy. For now, I’ll give this movie three stars***. I enjoyed it and I wouldn’t mind watching it again.
Blindspotting is a modern buddy movie that is set against the backdrop of a changing Oakland. What is less obvious, but still ever poignant, is that the two main characters, Collin and Miles, are changing too. The fast-paced story takes place over three days, but includes appropriate flashbacks.
It doesn’t seem to take much, but you get a good sense of the people involved. The real-life friendship between the actors, Daveed Diggs and Rafael Casal comes through, as well as they’re lyrical-wordsmithing skills. Actors Janina Gavankar and Jasmine Cephas Jones, who play respective love interests to Collin and Miles, add to the weight of the story and the authenticity of the film. By the end you get a better sense why they have to and how they are going to change.
Stylistically, this film seems simple: Big block text, what look like basic camera techniques, existing locations, but this movie is not simple or basic. There are so many deep, thought-provoking themes and imagery throughout mixed in with funny buddy situations, making this film complex, amusing, serious, sobering and amazing.
I watched this movie twice. It set a little deeper the second time, it made me laugh more and made me a bit more worried, but at the same time hopeful for the world.
I give this movie four stars**** on the Cinematic Masterpiece side of the scale. I want to watch this again and again. I want to talk about it. It just might be one of my favorites, but I'll only know with time. I’m sorry I didn’t get to support this movie in theaters. I checked the DVD out from my local library. Addendum March 4, 2019: This gets bumped up to five stars*****. I've been talking about it for the past few days and I've come to the conclusion that I love this movie. Done.
Isle of Dogs is a stop-motion animated movie by Wes Anderson that essentially comes down to the relationship of a boy searching for his best friend, his dog. This movie started off visually dull and slow in its story blooming, so much so that I started to lose interest, think about other things, and eventually I fell asleep. The next night I picked up where I left off, from what was labeled as part 3, and that to the end was more exciting, but only compared to first half. I'm not huge on animation, and I find that Wes Anderson is sometimes too quirky for my taste. For that reason, Isle of Dogs gets two stars**. I don't really care if I see this, again, and in fact, if I want to see a touching relationship between a child and their pet, I'd watch Okja.
Colette is a joli film about the real-life writing career of Colette, a famous turn-of-the-century multi-talented writer and stage artist. If you didn't know this was based on a true story, its about a young woman who marries a family friend and becomes his ghost writer and together they create a bestselling series of books, but alas, he does not want to give her credit. What a shame.
The production of this film is beautiful: Stunning locations! I gawked and drooled at all the wallpaper. I’m kind of a home and garden fanatic in my middle age. The costuming and styling was rich and detailed.
The story was interesting, but combined with the direction and action it lacked depth. I feel that way about a lot of biopics: they try to fit too much into the film, but I would much prefer they just dive in deep on a certain time period in the person's life.
The music was good, too: Listening to and then checking the stats afterwards, I'm glad to see that the majority of the soundtrack was mostly time period music with some original work and imaginative arrangements by Thomas Ades.
Although the characters were French, this film is acted by mostly British actors, and I love the British. I enjoyed the performances of Kiera Knightly and Dominic West. I have never seen any of the director, Wash Westmoreland's other films so I cannot compare.
I could watch this again because it was enjoyable and a feast for my eyes, but I don't see myself every buying it or seeking it out. It falls on the Cinematic Masterpiece end of the scale and gets a standard good, or three stars***.
